


Half a Heart

by ImVeryConfused



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Author Can't commit to Updating Regularly, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Child Abuse, F/M, Gay Billy Hargrove, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Lesbian Character, M/M, Original Character(s), Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:40:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25732990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImVeryConfused/pseuds/ImVeryConfused
Summary: After surviving the Mall incident, Neil's abuse of Billy takes a turn for the worst when he discovers that Billy is gay.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove & Jim "Chief" Hopper, Billy Hargrove & Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Billy Hargrove & Susan Hargrove, Billy Hargrove & The Party, Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington, Eleven | Jane Hopper & Billy Hargrove, Robin Buckley & Billy Hargrove, Robin Buckley & Billy Hargrove & Steve Harrington
Comments: 16
Kudos: 151





	1. Coming home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ⚠WARNING⚠ This in no way a light-hearted fic. In fact if you are triggered by topics such as CHILD ABUSE or SEXUAL ABUSE please click out now because that's precisely where we are heading.
> 
> I'm just going to go ahead and apologie for my irregular updating pattern already because i don't see myself updating past Chapter 2 until the end of August as i am studying for some exams. So sorry.

He felt like he had been holding in a deep breath ever since he had left the hospital. He balled his fists against his worn denims, trying to calm his jumping knees which couldn’t seem to stop moving throughout the journey. Pulling up on the driveway to the Hargrove home did nothing to alleviate the tightness in his chest, in fact it worsened the ache and he felt himself almost gasping for breath. Rubbing his chest, avoiding the bandaged area, Billy felt his heart begin to race and his vision blur slightly at the edges. 

Hopper had placed a concerned arm around Billy’s shoulders but unbeknownst to Hopper, it didn’t have the calming, reassuring affect that he intended. It only made Billy feel more trapped. Suddenly Billy’s seatbelt which he had hardly notice before felt like it was strangling him and there wasn’t enough air in the car. Billy rushed to remove the seatbelt which only seemed to become tighter as the seconds flew past. Fleeing from Hopper’s grip, Billy launched himself out of the car door, his feet planting on the gravel beneath.

Forcing his lungs to take in a deep breath, Billy felt the pain in his lungs begin to recede into a dull throb. Taking an anxious glance back inside the truck door, Billy could see that Hopper was giving him a concerned look so he gave the man a mock salute, hoping he would brush it off as one of Billy’s moody moments and nothing more.

Thankfully, Hopper seemed to do just that rolling his eyes at Billy’s antics before giving Billy a small wave, grabbing his steering wheel, and reversing out of the Hargrove driveway leaving Billy. Alone. 

Though nothing had changed in the appearance of the house, Billy couldn’t help but feel like a stranger as he walked up to the door. This was Billy’s house not home. Even during family meals where everyone sat at the table he felt like he didn’t belong there, like he was intruding on the peaceful moments of a family. Neil Hargrove, Billy’s father, was a severe man andhe always made it known that Billy was unwelcome in the Hargrove home. After Billy’s mother had died and Neil remarried, Billy was merely a liability. Remnants of his first marriage that he simply hadn’t been able to shake off yet.

So, Billy was reluctant to open the door. No matter how much he complained about the uncomfortable bed or the shitty food, Billy would prefer staying at the hospital to living at the Hargrove house. As his key slid into the lock, Billy almost wished that he had said something to Hopper when he had the chance.

When he opened the door, Billy was met with a familiar scene. Neil sat lazily on the sofa in front of the TV nursing a beer in his hand, legs kicked up on the sofa –something that he always shouted at Billy for. In the kitchen nearby the fridge was closing only to reveal Jeremy, one of Neil’s first friends that he met in Hawkings. 

Jeremy was one person on this world who Billy could honesty say he hated. Somehow, he always found little things about Billy to pick on. Either it was hair or his clothes, but he would always make subtle suggestions that Billy was too feminine, sometimes even going as far enough as saying that Billy was a fag. This always seemed vexed his father to the point that once, in a drunken rage he had tried to cut all of Billy’s hair off though luckily he Billy was able to escape due to Neil uncoordinated, drunken movements.

Another reason why Billy hated Jeremy was because the man always encouraged Neil’s poor drinking habits and Billy always bore the brunt of it so it wasn’t surprising that Jeremy had just taken a beer from the fridge and was heading to the sofa when he spotted Billy. His eyes grew wide and his mouth ‘o’ shaped and he brought up his hand to his face almost mockingly.

“And so, the King has returned.” He announces, mockingly bowing before chuckling a bit though Billy didn’t find anything funny.

At his words Neil began to stir in the sofa a bit, jerking his head back to see who Jeremy was addressing. When he set his eyes on Billy, Neil seemed to droop a bit.

“Oh, so you’re back huh?” He said dismissively taking a swig of his beer.

“Yes sir, I got discharged today.” 

“And aren’t you going to greet your uncle?” Neil asks, eyes narrowing as if daring Billy to disobey him.

A refusal was at the tip of Billy’s tongue as he want to retort that Jeremy was in no way his uncle but he knows that Neil’s response would be anything but helpful to condition at the moment especially as the nurse had advised him against any strenuous activities.

“Hello uncle Jeremy.” Billy greets quietly.

“Now that’s no way to greet your uncle.” Jeremy protests opening his arms wide, clearly already intoxicated. “Come here and give me a hug, I haven’t seen you in months.” He pouted as if Billy had been avoiding him, but it was common knowledge that Billy Hargrove had been hospitalised for the past 4 months.

Despite aim to avoid a confrontation with his father today, Billy didn’t move, ignoring Jeremy’s outstretched arms and looking away from the tall man to the wooden floorboards. 

“I said come here William.” Jeremy insisted, louder though Billy still didn’t move.

Surprisingly, it was Neil Hargrove who prevented the situation from escalating any further. “Jer just leave the queer alone, he’s just come back from the hospital.” Neil says also looking quite uncomfortable at the situation. “Billy go to your room.” He ordered and Billy was all to happy do so as he quickly walked past Jeremy towards his bedroom quickly shutting the door behind him.

Billy’s room is pretty much exactly how he left it. His collection of hair care items was still neatly on his table and his obscene posters on the wall unmoved. In fact, the only thing that was out of the ordinary was the small pile of books and the Walkman on the ground, all of which he knew belong to his step-sister Max. 

Sighing deeply at the fact the fact that he no longer had the intimidation factor needed to keep Maxine out of his room, Billy took a seat on his bed. Truthfully, Billy didn’t mind Max coming in his room anymore as they had hashed over their burning sibling rivalry during Billy’s hospital stay. Though he was asleep for most of the time, when he finally woke, the nurses wouldn’t stop praising his ‘little sister who stayed by his side every day’.

Apparently, she spent her weekends and her every moment after school in the chair beside his bed talking to him. Billy assumed she was probably going on about her nerdy friends or some drama in school –something Billy would have never stood for had he been awake—but it made Billy feel strangely warm inside to know that someone cared about him while he was injured. At least it was more than could be said about Neil as he hadn’t even visited Billy once during his hospitalisation.

For one blissful moment, Billy is completely calm. In his room he feels safe enough to completely relax. He was able to forget about Neil and people at school who had begun to circulate rumours about his disappearance. For a moment he was even able to forget about the ever-present pain in his chest. However, this moment was short-lived, and the door handle began to rattle and Billy once again put his guard up. 

The door slowly creaked open to reveal a shock of red hair and brilliant green eyes staring at Billy. Billy was able to relax slightly as he sent a smile at her. Apparently, that was enough permission for her to launch herself at Billy, wrapping him tightly in her short arms. It was perfect. For a while the world paused as they were enclosed in each other’s embrace. Minutes went by and neither of them even attempted to speak as they both knew that no word could be said that would possibly remove any of the atrocities they had experienced in the last few months.

When they finally released each other, Billy let out a small chuckle feeling slightly awkward as he had never been one to initiate physical contact between them but he couldn’t help but note how right the hug felt.

“Why were you in my room shit bird?” Billy joked trying to bring some playfulness though it didn’t quite work as his voice was slightly croaky and clogged with emotion. 

“I… I know its dumb but...” She swallowed deeply; her eyes glassy. “ At the beginning, we all really thought that you weren’t going to make it you know. ‘Cause the doctors were saying all kinds of things and I was so scared. But… when I was in here, I just felt safer. Like I was connected to you or something…” She trailed off blushing lightly at her admittance.

Once again Billy felt his eyes well up and he swiftly pulled Maxine into a hug.

“Thank you, Maxine.” Billy said and If Maxine felt and dampness on her blouse, she certainly didn’t mention it. “I thought it was over you know. When that thing hit me."

“There was so much blood.” Maxine admitted through tears as the parted. “I’m so happy that you are alive.”

And for the first time in a long while, Billy could truly say, he was also that he was happy to be alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to drop a comment ;)


	2. Madmax

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHH YESSS. MY TRIUMPHANT RETURN. 
> 
> As some of you would know i had to take a break because i had exams. It has honestly been so had trying to stop myself from writing or posting anything new. Thanks for your waiting!!!!
> 
> NOW ONWARDS MY LOVELIESSS.

To say Max was devastated when Billy was hauled onto the stretcher would be an understatement. In that moment, watching as paramedics struggled to stop the blood flowing out from the hole in her brother’s chest, everything else seemed to lose meaning. The only thing she could think about was Billy. Eleven’s comforting words fell upon death ears as Maxine felt a certain numbness to the world around her because it couldn’t be real.

The precise moment that the EMTs went from calling out to Billy, trying to get a response from him, to rushing to fetch an oxygen tank to resuscitate him was undeniably the worst moment of her life.

Billy had died right in front of her. He had bled out all over the Mall floor and taken his last breath looking strangely peaceful as he did.

Maxine can’t remember herself reacting, but Hopper had later informed her that she had screamed herself hoarse, so he carried her, still screaming, out of the Mall. Actually, Maxine doesn’t remember much after that. All she knows is that she woke up in hospital a day later with her mother by her side.

Susan of course made a huge fuss as soon as Maxine awoke asking her if she was alright, but Maxine couldn’t understand why she was fussing over her. The first thing that came out of her mouth was ‘Where’s Billy?’ to which he mother’s lips tightened into a thin line and her brows furrowed which told Max all that she needed to know.

At her brother’s loss, Max felt anguish like never before. Even when her biological father had died, she hadn’t felt such pain radiating through her. Her mind jumped between petty argument that her and Billy have had over the years, since they had met. She was filled with such deep regret as she began to wish that she hadn’t told on Billy as much she did and she let him pick the radio station more or even get the last word in sometimes.

So many words unsaid. So many regrets.

Maxine felt herself being to spiral until she felt her mother’s hand on her shoulder.

“I’ll be honest with you. He’s in the intensive care unit now. His heart stopped on the way because whoever attacked him managed to nick his pulmonary artery when they stabbed him.” Susan said looking as if she was seconds away from bursting into tears but striving to be brave for Max. Though her expression turned into one of confusion when she saw a small smile appear on her daughter’s face. “Did you hear me ok Maxine?”

“Yes, I heard you fine.” Maxine replied almost giggling.

“Then why are you laughing? This ain’t nothing to joke about.” Susan scolded appalled at her daughter’s reaction. She knew Max and Billy had their rivalry, but she never knew it went as far as Max wishing harm to Billy.

“I know it’s just… Billy’s so stubborn and he’s still fighting up to now. I thought he…” Max started but she shook her head almost as if dismissing the bad memories. “He’s not gonna let anything, even an injury like this get the better of him. I know it.” Max said with complete certainty.

And Max was never wrong.

* * *

She didn’t even know why she’d been so worked up; it was just Billy. Yet she had spent an hour getting all dolled up and combing out her hair –something that he always teased her about. She then spent another hour lazily lounging on her bed ruining any progress she had made with her hair as it quickly frizzed up again. By now she was practically buzzing with anxiety as Billy was scheduled to come how a whole hour ago!

‘Though I am thankful that Hopper had volunteered to take Billy home, what is taking him so long?’ Maxine thought twisting over in her bed again. For a second, she began think about calling Lucas but all thoughts about him had come to a quick halt when she her the front door creak open. For a second Max wanted to shoot out of her room to greet her brother but she forced herself to stop quickly remembering that it could also be her mother who went to the supermarket who had entered the house, so she listened.

Other than her stepfather’s friend Jeremy’s booming voice, she couldn’t really make out anything thing else so she was still clueless as to who had entered. Though when she heard the door to the room besides her own open up, she knew that it had to have been Billy. Taking a few moments to run her hands through her hair to try and rectify the mess she had created, Maxine rushed out of her room to Billy’s own.

Slowly opening the door, Maxine peered inside to find her brother sitting on his bed, exactly how she had pictured him whenever she dreamt of him coming home. Wasting now time at all, Maxine all but threw herself at him, carefully avoiding his wound. She didn’t know how Billy would react as they had never hugged before but the was glad when she felt him wrap his arms around her rather than merely patting her back or tossing her aside.

In that moment, it was like all their sibling rivalry had just cancelled out. She could tell that he needed this hug as much as she did.

“Why were you in my room shitbird?” Billy asked as they parted making her smile a bit. Usually his voice held so much more malice and his insults stung but she could tell by his tone that he was playing around.

“I… I know its dumb but… at the beginning, we all really thought that you weren’t going to make it you know.” She said feeling more vulnerable than she was ever comfortable with in front of him. “‘Cause the doctors were saying all kinds of things and I was so scared. But… when I was in here, I just felt safer. Like I was connected to you or something…” She said feeling quite lame, thinking that he was going to tease her but he she was quite shocked as she felt herself being pulled into another hug.

“Thank you, Maxine.” Billy whispered into her shoulder. “I thought it was over you know. When that thing hit me.” He admitted tearily and it was enough to cause Maxine’s own eyes to leak as she pulled him in tighter.

“There was so much blood.” Maxine admitted through tears. It was strange because since the incident, she had refused to speak to anyone about it. Locking all her feelings away but as soon as she had set her eyes upon Billy, she could her but let her walls fall. “I’m so happy that you are alive.”

And to her words, Billy gave Maxine a smile that he had never seen before. It wasn’t snide or forced. It was genuinely and he just reached up and ruffled her hair around, clearly not appreciative of all the time she had spent taming it. “Thanks kiddo.”

After that, time just seemed to fly by as Billy sat on the chair with Max lying shamelessly in his bed as he scanned through heaps of missed classwork.

“Do you wanna know what theories people in school have made up about you Billy?” Max said suddenly, drawing Billy’s attention. “A lot of people think that you were kidnapped.”

To this Billy gives Max an incredulously look, confused as to how people had come up with these this theory.

“Yeah and that’s not even the best one. Apparently, you were abducted by aliens but only the sci-fi nerds believe that.” She said earing a loud laugh from Billy.

“It makes sense after that bullshit article the government put out about me being stabbed by a Russian. It was obviously a cover up so of course people would come to their own conclusions.”

“Your friends Tommy and Carol were asking me about it. Even though I told them you got stabbed, they didn’t believe me and kept pressing me for an answer though I would never tell them. They really miss you I guess.”

“Tommy H and Carol don’t give a shit about me.” Billy said with a nasty sneer on his face, angrily envisioning his little sister being surrounded by older kids. “They probably just wanted something to gossip about.”

“You were always hanging out with them though.”

“If they really gave a shit about me they would have visited in the 3 months that I was in hospital. They are both assholes. I’m just pissed that it took me getting stabbed by That Thing for me to realise it.”

For a while Max just stares at Billy realising that he truly had changed. Before the Mindflayer had attacked him, he only care about his social status. Max was sure that he would even befriend the devil for a bit of popularity. This was clearly his aim as when he came to Hawkings and he stepped into a school of kind, normal people but he managed to befriends the two biggest assholes.

Max was about to say something along the lines of ‘You are better off without them’ or ‘Those losers don’t even know what they are missing out on’ when her mothers shrill voice sounded.

“Maxine, Billy. Lunch is ready.” She announced causing Max to immediately spring up.

“Mum made your favourite to celebrate you coming home today.” She informed him.

“Let’s not keep her waiting then.” Billy smiles thought he couldn’t shake the feeling of discomfort at the thought of Susan doing something specially for him as she had never done so before, not even on his birthday. She wasn’t his mum afterall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!!!
> 
> Comments/Kudos motivate me so much!!!


	3. Lasagna's My Favourite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner at the Hargrove house is never a peaceful affair...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Guys! 
> 
> If you follow my stories you would know that i have taken a massive pause...like 3/4 months now. I just been having some issues in my personal like and some of these themes hit a little too close to home. Even though i don't particularly enjoy writing this as much anymore, i am going to complete all the stories i have started but i doubt i'll be posting many new stories. If i do they'll be much more fluffier.
> 
> ⚠WARNING!!!!⚠
> 
> RACIST AND HOMOPHBIC LANGUAGE !!!!! (Not that i agree with either)

Dinner at the Hargrove household was never a peaceful affair. It usually started off with Max chattering on about her friends and stuff she had learnt at school whilst Neil would complain about his lazy, no-good co-workers. As the conversation progressed, some way or another Neil would find a reason or another to begin grilling into Billy making the whole room horribly tense. Billy being the rebellious teen he was would likely say something that his father deemed as disrespectful, worsening the situation, and often leading to Billy being sent to bed with a half-empty stomach. 

So, no. Billy was not looking forward to dinner despite Susan having put effort into making his favourite meal because no amount of lasagna could cover up the shambles which was their family.

By the time Billy and Max arrived at the dinner table, Susan and Jeremy had already been seated with Neil in between the two.

“I’m telling you Neil, he’s a faggot.” Jeremy swore, his mere words causing Billy to tense up and freeze like a convict caught with a shovel. His eyes grew wide and he stopped mid-step feeling a sudden urge to escape back to his room. “I’ve seen the way he looks at me with his queer fucking eyes.”

“But he has a wife and a little boy Jer.” Neil protested.

“Not even that could stop a faggot when he sees a buff man like me in my overalls.” Jeremy said, flexing his arms causing both Neil and Jeremy to descend into loud, table slamming, gasping laughter. Even Susan besides them who looked slightly uncomfortable at the exchange and the loud laughter which followed, gave them an Oscar deserving grin. Though she didn’t make any contributions to the conversation her silence, in Billy’s opinion, was worse than any comment.

“What took you so long?” Neil snapped, smile quickly falling off his face upon seeing Billy. He began impatiently tapping his fingers against the wooden table as if they had been waiting for hours. “I’m here starving because you can’t be bothered to lift your lazy arse and join your family for a meal. And you’ve even made your sister late too because of your nonsense.”

“Sorry sir. I just lost track of time.” Billy apologised in a small voice.

After a long, tense moment of Neil glaring at Billy like he was seconds away from grabbing him and walloping him till he howled, Neil gave a rather disgusted tut and looked away.

Max quickly seated herself besides her mom leaving the only space left for Billy between herself and Jeremey. Though Susan had prepared his favourite meal, the prospect of eating sat next to Jeremy made hospital food seem more desirable. For a while Billy just stood there staring at the chair in clear disdain. However almost as if reading his mind, Neil shot Billy a withering glare, killing any refusal he had. So Billy took his seat.

Susan quickly beings serving the dinner, not wanting to keep he husband waiting any longer.

“How was work dear?” Susan asked in a small voice as she plated him a double portion of lasagna.

“For some reason Max thought is was a good idea to hire an intern. A useless boy. And you’d never guess what he said to me.” Neil began his daily tirade of complaints –something Billy certain hadn’t missed during his hospital stay.

“Cheeky little nigger.” Jeremy says in disgust. “He probably doesn’t get enough training at home. Needs a good fucking belting. Isn’t that right William?” Jeremy asks grinning as usual, in a knowing sort of way at Billy.

At first Billy looked shocked that the conversation was even directed towards him then his face settled into a small glare.

“He said isn’t that right Billy?” Neil asked loudly, slamming his palm onto the table causing the dishes to quake and both Max and Susan to jump a it.

“Yes sir.” Billy quickly agreed nails digging in deeply to his thighs.

Over the course of the meal, Jeremy repeatedly sent the conversation over to Billy to which he gave no more than a three word reply.

“He’s not very talkative today is he?” Jeremy chuckled pointing his fork at Billy causing him to tense up with discomfort.

“Well he has just gotten back for hospital. I’m sure after some rest he will be back to himself.” Susan quickly pipes up before Neil can interject. This was the second time that day that Susan had surprised him. She had never spoken any words in his defence before. 

“Nonsense.” Neil quickly dismissed. “He’s been resting for tree bloody months now.” 

From the corner of his eyes Billy can see Max flinch.

“And we are so happy that you are home now.” Susan almost whispers. To this Billy concluded that the person before him wasn’t actually Susan at all. Making special meals for him. Defending him not once but twice. She was almost acting… like a mom.

“Tell us about the attack William.” Jeremy pleads.

“Didn’t you see the paper?” Billy asks, hands trembling a bit from the memory. 

“Yes but I want to here it from your lips.” He smiled then wrapped his lips around his beer bottle and took a swig.

Max a Billy share a brief look before Billy launched in to telling the official story.

“When I took Max and some of her friends to the Mall, some Russian assholes wanted to scrap. I didn’t see that they had knifes and one of them stabbed me a couple of times in the chest.” He said as quickly as possible, even the fake story making him feel a bit nauseous.

“So you couldn’t even fight them back?” Jeremey said with judgement clear in his voice. 

“What the hell was I supposed to tod when the guy was about three times my height?” Billy argued.

“You were supposed to be a man. Show those fuckers not to mess with you. Not get stabbed and drain all my fucking money on your hospital bills.” Neil grits out, eye-slightly glazed over in his alcohol addled state.

“I’ll pay it all back.” Billy said in a small voice, placing his force own with his food barely touched. Chest twinging slightly.

“Damn right you will pay me back every single cent!” Neil shouted.

“It’s not his fault that he was attacked!” Max suddenly shouted jumping out of his seat, scrapping the chair against the floor as she did. Her face was an angry bright red and her eyes had a hard defiance within them.

Neil’s eyes also grew hard as he stared at his step-daughter who had been increasingly troublesome lately.

“Come on Neil. It’s Billy’s first day back-“ Susan started as she rubbed circles into her husbands back.

“Can I go to my room?” Billy interrupted.

“But you’ve barely finished your dinner Billy.” Susan comments.

“I just feel a bit sick.” Billy said quickly as he tried to hide the fact that his voice was thick with tears.

“Is it you chest? Should we go back to the hospital?” Max asked worriedly.

“Like hell your gonna take any more of my god damn money.” Neil snapped slamming his hand down against the table once more.

“I-I just need a lie down.” Billy said quickly shooting out of his chair and making his way back to his room, tears falling onto his cheeks as soon as he arrived. As much as he knew that Neil hated him, he would have at least thought that he had been somewhat worried during his hospital stay. 

Billy thought wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for reading/ commenting/ kudos.


	4. Rumours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Billy's first day back at school......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really enjoyed writing this chapter....tell me what you think!

In some ways, it could be argued that Billy’s first day back to school was pretty normal. As soon as he stepped foot out of his Camaro, the loud roaring of the engine had caught every student in the parking lots attention and their eyes followed Billy as he strolled towards the school building. Though Billy wasted no time stopping to chat when Tommy H called out to him in a friendly manner. He didn’t even bat a eyelash when Kimmy, who clothing certainly broke the dress code, whispered his name, trying to get his attention during math.

The only thing that Billy was grateful to The Monster for, was that during his agonisingly long stay at the hospital, he realised that he simply didn’t need the validation from anyone that he had once craved. He was just happy to be alive and that was it. So he didn’t care that rumours were flying around that he was involved in some gang war and had gotten severely injured. Or that people had thought that all the time he was missing, he had spent kidnapped, tied up in some creep’s basement. For all he cared, they could continue formulating their ridiculous theories as none of them would even come close to the truth. They didn’t deserve the truth.

So when Carol and Tommy H had corner him before lunch time, pretending to be concerned and asking where he had been for so long he replied harshly “I was abducted by aliens cause isn’t that what you’ve been telling everybody Carol?” with a wicked grin before leaving them both stunned.

Rather than hanging around with the Tommys and Carols that seemed to congregate in Hawkings high, Billy elected to sit by himself in the canteen, sending warning looks to any brave soul who tried to claim the seat besides him. And he was peaceful that way until he heard someone slump into the seat besides him. Furrowing his brows and pinching his lips, Billy threw a heavy glarea across the table where he saw someone that he vaguely recognised.

Toning down the thick black liner and removing the red highlights in her hair in his mind, Billy could almost pinpoint where he knew this girl, narrow his eyes as he realise that he had seen this girl--

“I’m Robin by the way. I was at the mall when the Mindflayer stabbed a hole through your chest.” She said which a air of nonchalance that in no way matched her words.

Billy’s hole body suddenly tensed up and his had subconsciously flew to his chest. Quickly looking around to make sure no one had heard her, he furiously whispered “What the hell you fucking nerd. You can’t just go around say that shit.”

  
"Its fine, it’s pretty much what everyone thinks anyway. You know what i heard today? They think you’re a doppelganger." She whispered the last bit conspiratorially almost garnering a chuckle from Billy. He hadn’t heard that one yet.   
  
"What were you doing in the mall anyway?" Billy asked.  
  
"Me, Steve and Dustin cracked the Russian code so we were trying to put a stop to their evil plans." She shrugged casually reaching for one of Billy’s chips.  
  
For a while Billy remains silent processing what he had heard. "5 months ago I would have laughed in your face... and maybe even poured my drink in your hair because you are fucking crazy. But after what I’ve seen... you don’t sound so crazy anymore.” He admits.

A sad smile appears on Robin’s face, contrary to he earlier cockiness. Reaching her hand out, aiming for another of Billy’s chips, her attempts were quickly thwarted as Billy quicicly flicked her hand away.

“Eat your own fucking food.” He said wit admittedly less sting than he had planned.

“But this spaghetti literally tastes like toilet water I’m not even kidding.”

“Been drinking a lot of toilet water then?”

“Oh shut up and give me some chips.” She said snatching another out of his plate but this time, he let her.  
  


* * *

One thing that would never change no matter how much their relationship had progressed, Billy had realised, is that Max could never fucking be on time. As he sat on the hood of his Carmao, Billy had internally made a deal with himself, that if that little red-headed shit didn’t come out before his cigarette was burnt out, he would leave. And as the cigarette reduced to all but ash, Billy angrily opened his car door. She could skate home.

Slotting the key inside and turning on the ignition, Billy was surprised to see a Max in front of his car, though she wasn’t alone.

“Can you give Robin a ride home?” Max asks not seeming a at all remoseful for the long wait she had just given him.

“You get the hell in the car right now Maxine.” Billy huffed out. “And you better my way unless you want to be road kill.”

“I don’t live far from you!” She pleaded with a cheeky sort of grin that made Billy question her every word.  
  


Robin took Billy rolling his eyes as his agreement as she quickly opened his door, sitting in the passenger seat.   
  
Robin and Max chattered, bonding over their joint love of annoying Billy. Whilst Billy is silent. Normally he would be tapping the wheel to his music which played obnoxiously loud on the radio, but recently he had been letting Max choose.

“I’m going to drop Maxine first or else she will miss curfew.” Billy said in a quiet voice. Robin nods in agreement.

When Maxine leaves the car she waves them both away promising Billy that she will cover for him.

The drive to Robbin’s house isn’t too far and soon Billy has parked outside her house.

Robin reaches for the door, about to leave then she stops.

“You know, you’re not as mean as you would like people to think.” She said in a low voice, offering him a small but genuine smile.

“And you aren’t as tough as you would like them to think.” Billy replies, not looking at her. And they part ways without any more words exchanged.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for Reads/Kudos/Comments.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Billy has a heart-to-heart.

The next day, Carol and Tommy knew better than to approach Billy. In fact, everyone kept their distance merely shooting glances at him from a distance. And Billy loved it that way. Ever since moving from Cali, Billy felt as if he had to put on a big bravado to make everyone notice him. Billy felt like he had to be so boisterous because everyone in Hawkins pictured people from California to be all exciting and outgoing. Now since he no longer cared what anyone else thought, he sat by himself at lunch reading Little Woman to his heart’s content.

Not even Robin had ventured to take the seat beside him today, something that he was secretly bummed out about, but he quickly dismissed that thought. In fact, Billy had not seen Robin all day. He was about to chalk her amiability yesterday up as fluke until the end of the day, when he found her resting on the bonnet of his car. Though she wasn’t alone. Sitting confidently on Billy Camaro with his hair looking more voluptuous than ever, Steve Harrington lounged with dark sunglasses laying on his face.

“What the fuck are you two losers doing on my car?” Billy growled sending shooting glare at them both.

“Calm down Hargrove. We come in peace.” Steve joked holding his hands up to which Billy rolled his eyes.

“I don’t have time for this shit. If you don’t move, I’ll run you both over.” Billy said striding past the pair and flinging open his car door.

  
“Chill out Billy.” Robin said sliding off his bonnet and walking to his window.

“Why the fuck is Max always late?” Billy let out a moan of frustration as he squeezed steering wheel tightly.

“That’s what we are trying to tell you. She’s skating home with Lucas.” Robin said.

“Fucking Sinclair.” Billy yells smacking his palm against the wheel.  
  
Without any prompting, Robin walks around the car and opens the door, quickly planting herself in the passenger seat.

“What the hell are you doing in my car?” Billy asked.

“Chips.” Steve said opening the door to the back seat, also inviting himself inside. “Let’s go get some chips (or french fries for any American readers).”  
  
“No we aren’t getting chips. I am going to look for my sister.”

“I know a place not far from here that does the most amazing chips.” Steve said practically salivating. “The owner Antonio, always gives me extra because I found his lost keys one time.”

“We are not going anywhere. Both of you get out of my car.” Billy states.

“C’mon Billy. How about this, If we go, grab a bite to eat and you hate it, we will never try to speak to you again?” Robin promises.

“Well…You not talking to me again seems like too much of a good deal to miss out on.” Billy says.

“That’s the spirit Hargrove. I’ll show you the way.”

* * *

  
  


“I hope you know you are paying pretty boy.” Billy states after the waitress takes their order.

At his words, Steve chuckles in a cheerful, beautiful sort of way that only Steve could pull off causing Billy to promptly avert his gaze.

  
The ‘amazing’ chips that Steve had promised were no more special than the chip Max had made for him when she had began to learn how to cook. In short, to compensate for the fact that the chips were stale burnt sticks, they had been heavily over-salted. Robin seemed to share this sentiment as she was currently shifting the chips around her plate and none of them reached her lips.

However Billy couldn’t bring himself to voice this due to the sheer pleasure that was on Steve’s face as he munched on another chip.

“Are you going to finish that?” He asked Billy innocently pointing at Billy’s portion.

“No I’m… full. Big lunch.” Bill lied sliding his plate along to Steve who immediately began devouring Billy’s own.

“You can have mine too.” Robin declared with an undisguised look of disappointment. Steve’s eyes lit up as he dug into his meals.

And then, the conversation drifted into a peaceful sort of silence. One that he hadn’t managed to achieve with many people before as in his experience, silence was normally accompanied by awkward darting looks and failed attempts to initiate a new conversation.

“You know you don’t have to hide stuff from us.” Steve says quietly after a few minutes of silence. He is suddenly serious. Billy doesn’t think he has seen this side of Steve before.  
  
“Well… i don’t exactly know either of you so why should I trust you?” Billy asks.

  
“Because we’ve been thorough the same shit.” Steve reasons. “That same thing tried to kill you, tried to kill us too. And we all came out alive and that’s great but we aren’t even allowed to talk about it. Not even to our parents. And that’s… complete and utter bull shit.”

“We only really have each other to talk to so if you ever need someone to listen to you, we just want to let you know that we are here for you.”

Billy’s throat feels clogged up with emotion. For a while he just sits there, willing the tears to go down. He never thought he would ever have anyone else other than Max. Then he looks up at Steve with wide, fearful eyes.

  
“Sometimes I wake up and question if any of it was real.” He admitted in a small vulnerable voice.

“Same here.” Robin agrees.

“And me.” Steve agrees. “I mean we were drugged to our fucking eyeballs but that not the point.”

“You were… drugged?” Billy asks.

“Well that’s a story for another time.” Steve says darkly. “The point that I was trying to make is that we are here for you ok? You don’t ever feel ashamed admitting anything to us because we are probably going through the same shit.”

“So I can come to you with all my emotional bullshit?” Billy asks sounding a bit unsure.

“Yep. You can come to us with anything Bils.” Robin assures him.

  
And it doesn’t take long for Billy to call in that favour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really excited for the next chapter!!!! 
> 
> Thank you for Reading/ Kudos/ Comments.


	6. Heather

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Billy sees Heather...

Impossible.

She wore a tight red dress and a white, pleated skirt which flared out at the bottom.

It can’t be.

Her bangs curled against her forehead and hair was up in a messy bun.

She’s dead.

But there she was. On the other end of the corridor talking to her friends. Very much alive.

Billy felt the bile rise to his throat and beads of sweat build on his brow. As he takes some tentative steps towards her, his legs shake. As he nears her, she looks up at him, shooting him a worried look.

“Are you feeling ok Hargrove?” She asks.

“I-I’m so s-s-sorry.” Billy whispered reaching out a trembling hand and placing it on her shoulder. Her shoulder was bony and slightly damp as it had been raining outside. Upon touching her, tears will up in Billy’s eyes. She was real. He wasn’t imagining it. Heather was here.

“What do you have to be sorry for?” She asked looking slightly apprehensive.

“I-I k-ki-killed you.” Billy says feeling a tear run down his face.

“Get away from me you freak!” She yells. And suddenly Billy is pushed backwards by a taller, bulkier boy. Billy recognises him. Sebastian from the football team.

“What the hell do you think you are doing to my girlfriend Hargrove?” He shouts, barging Billy once again.

His girlfriend? Heather wasn’t Billy’s girlfriend. Sebastian’s girlfriend was Sara… who looks strikingly a lot like Heather. She wore a similar hairstyle as messy buns were in trend. Her cheerleading outfit also looked quite similar to Heather’s lifeguarding uniform. Focusing his eyes, Billy realised that this girl has green eyes not Heather’s chocolatey brow. She was also a bit shorter and rounder…

She wasn’t Heather.

Billy breathed out a sigh of relief. Or at least he tried to, but the air felt trapped in his lungs. He just couldn’t fucking breathe. He could see Sebastian’s mouth moving angrily. He was probably shouting but Billy couldn’t hear him over the thump, thump, thump, thump of his heartbeat in his ears.

Looking around, Billy saw a crowd gathering and people were watching him. People. So many fucking people. Crowding the hallways. Taking up all the air and leaving none left for Billy. He has to get out of here. Before he suffocates.

Quickly fleeing the hallway, Billy found himself in the field. Collapsing onto the wet grass.

“It’s impossible. It c-can’t be. Sh-she’s dead. It’s not her.” Billy repeats curling up in a ball trying to calm himself, but his brain wasn’t having any of it.

He dug his fingers into the grass at the feeling of the sharp, stabbing pain shooting down his arm. His heart was racing like it was going to burst out of his chest. Then he knew. He was having a heart attack. He always thought he would die in Cali but he was going to fucking die on the wet field of a shitty school where he didn’t have any friends. All alone.

Though suddenly he feels a small hand wrapping around his frame.

He can almost make out a voice. “In… and out.” It says repeatedly.

For a while Billy questions whether the voice is even real or not. But as he edges closer to death, he doesn’t see any other choice that to listen to the voice.

Though it burns, he forces his lungs to breath in… and out. Just like the voice is telling him. And after some long, gruelling minutes which feels like hours to Billy, his breathing calms down enough for him to realise that the person speaking to him was indeed real and it was Robin.

“You okay there Bils?” She asks in a quiet, concerned voice.

And Billy wants to say yes. He really does but he can’t quite get the word out so he says “No” in a small, vulnerable voice.

“That’s understandable Billy. You just had a panic attack Billy.” She explains. “I’ve had panic attacks before. They’re shit and it feels like you are dying right?”

“Yeah.”

“For my panic attacks, there is normally something that triggers it. Do you know what set you off?” She asked running a hand through out his hair. Like his mom used to.

“I-I saw H-Heather.” He sobbed.

“Billy,” Robin said with her eyes full of worry. “Heather… Heather’s dead. You remember, that right?”

“Yeah of course I fucking know.” I killed her.

“So, how could you have seen her?” Robin reasons.

“I know it wasn’t… wasn’t her. It was fucking Sara Dawson and now Sebastian on the football team wants to kill me.” Billy moaned.

“Sebastian is… a big guy.” Is the only thing Robin can say to which Billy agrees.

“For a second, I just thought it was her. I-I Thought it was Heather and… I just wanted to say sorry to her.” Billy admits, not caring that tears track down his face and onto the grass. “She was so fucking nice to me.”

“Heather was always really kind, wasn’t she?” Robin agrees.

“Why did it have to be her? She was my friend. W-we would make jokes at work. About all the creepy parents who would stare at us. And she would always cover for me when I couldn’t make a shift. She was so kind… so why’d it have to be her?” Billy cried.

“Billy,” Robin says, cupping his faces which is red and wet from crying. “Heather was… an amazing person. And she deserved better. No one deserves to die like that. But you didn’t deserve to go thorough any of that either Billy. It wasn’t your fault. It was the Mindflayer that killed Heather, not you so you don’t have to apologise. You were just as much of a victim as she was.”

At her words Billy broke down, thrusting himself at Robin’s small frame and embracing her, letting out heart-wrenching sobs.

“I think about her all the time.” He admits in as he sobs.

“It wasn’t your fault Billy.” Robin reiterates wrapping her arms around him and stroking his hair. “You were being controlled by the Mindflayer.

“I was d-doing all of these… _awful_ things. And I couldn’t stop myself.”

“That’s what the Mindflayer does Bils. It takes control of people and make them do stuff they would never do in their right mind. None of it was your fault. In fact, you /saved/ us all when you stopped the Mindflayer from hurting El. You’re a hero Billy.” She asserted though Billy couldn’t quite wrap his mind around it. He should have been stronger so the Mindflayer couldn’t control him.  
  
“W-when… when th-that Thing h-hit me… I really w-wanted to die.” He whispers so quietly that Robin nearly misses it.

“Well, I’m glad you are alive.” Robin says tightening her hold on him with her own voice thick with tear. And if Billy felt her tears fall onto his shoulder, he never mentioned it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for Reading/Kudos/Commenting


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